It's come to this? Partisan Plants?

From Ball Publishing's Acres Online we received the following press release.

Fox, MSNBC Launch Political Plant Brands
Late-breaking news from Spring Trials … Two new plant brands are coming onto the market, and both are aimed at capitalizing on the coming political season.

In its first-ever foray into floriculture, Fox News is launching a series of angel wing-type begonias called Right Wing Begonias, aimed, as the name implies, at red-state Republican gardeners.

Not to be outdone, television network MSNBC has countered with its own flower series, Leftunias, a line of petunias they say they’ll market to “progressive gardeners seeking new trends in neighborhood beautification.”

Both were last-day additions to the MasterTag display at Sakata during the California Spring Trials.

Why get involved in something as far-afield from news as gardening? Fox News Channel’s VP of Corporate Communications Sidney Finch told GrowerTalks that gardening has come heavily onto the radar of News Corporation executives (Fox’s parent company) in the wake of Michelle Obama’s White House gardening efforts (she’s launching a gardening book this spring) and also lucrative L&G advertising by major fertilizer companies and DIY retailers.

“We were looking for a way to reach mainstream America—our conservative viewers,” Sidney says. “And when we look at the red states, which are predominantly Southern and Midwestern, we thought that what they all have in common is gardening. [Gardening is] a wholesome American pastime.”

But apparently word of Fox’s plan leaked out to an MSNBC executive via a garden-enthusiast waiter at the famous Off the Record bar in Washington, D.C., who overheard a table of Fox employees discussing the idea. Humorously, at first, the waiter didn’t know it was gardening Fox was getting involved in. He thought it was something more sinister.

“When he heard the word ‘plant,’ he thought it meant plant as in spy or agent, and that ‘begonia’ was his code name,” an MSNBC spokesman told me from their Washington bureau. “When we found out it was garden plants, we decided to counterattack, and with something aimed at progressive gardeners in the blue states. Why should Fox have all the fun?”

Both news agencies told me they’d use retail sell-through data to gauge political leanings—a flower poll, if you will. (No word yet on what retail outlets will be carrying them.) Also, they hint that their could be widespread boosting of the programs by celebrity pundits such as Fox’s Bill O’Reilly and MSNBC’s Chris Matthews.

MasterTag’s Gerry Giorgio, who gave GrowerTalks the sneak peek at the new program, said they were approached by both news agencies within a week of one another back in January.

“We had begun work designing the Right Wing Begonia brand, but were a bit uncomfortable about being involved in something that could be so polarizing, politically,” Gerry says. “Then when MSNBC called and we came up with Leftunias, we were off the hook because now we had both sides of the political spectrum covered.” He admitted with a laugh that he’s considered calling the Ron Paul campaign about an independent-oriented brand, but doesn’t feel there’s enough retail potential expect in Arkansas and North Dakota, where Mr. Paul did well in the primaries.

No word on who the breeders of either series is; Gerry says they want to remain behind the scenes to avoid offending existing customers who may lean politically in the opposing direction.

As for the container for the new series? Gerry says that was a no-brainer. “Super Packs, of course,” he said with a smile. “We’ve already got a special mold being made.”

Got a comment on mixing politics and gardening? Let me know your thoughts HERE.

So, readers, what do you think of this development? 

My first reaction was to start composing a rant, decidedly opposed to partisan politics mucking up our plant-buying decisions - especially this year!  But then when I Googled the new plant names, the web came up with a big nothing for them.  Then I noticed the date of the press release - April 1.   Not just a day for pranks, but a Sunday, a day of rest for most PR folks. 

So I wrote to the supposed author of the press release, Chris Beytes, editor and publisher of Grower Talks, and this was all news to him, so I'm considering it a hoax.  But hey, they almost got me!  Whoever "they" may be.

Comments

[susan harris]

UPDATE: When pressed, Chris came clean as the prankster. Good one! Here's his latest email to me:
"Oh it's from me. But it's not a press release, it's my widely read weekly email newsletter/blog, Acres Online. 19,000 readers all around the world, and it's going on like it's 10th year! I'd of course never tell a lie in it. Except I might exaggerate once a year."

[Vicky Nielson]

Dang! I was hoping to put them both in a container and let them duke it out to see who wins total pot domination.

[Christopher C NC]

I'm reading this and thinking you are a couple days late.

[anne]

Haha, great prank! I'm SO relieved it's not true!

[KM]

I figured this had to be an Onion article or something and I'm relieved that is pretty much the case.

[UrsulaV]

I was thinking April Fools pretty much from the logo on...but nicely done!

[karenj]

Weeeelllll I must say, as I have way too many of both red begonias and blue petunias planted this year, I had a brief flare of capitalistic hope that the surplus could be turned into a profit.....sigh....guess I'll just have lots of pretty flowers in my gardens instead.

[EMPulse]

Neither one really fits me, so here's the one I came up with for myself:

*CREEPING MIDDLE*
(vinca voter, "the wise choice")

A flowering plant with a mind of its own.

- INDEPENDENT growth, needs very little external influence to thrive
- Perfect for the CENTER of your garden
- Never leans too far to the LEFT or the RIGHT

[Tyler]

How strange that politics is entering the gardening sphere, although I don't know who would take it really seriously. Personally I find them sort of funny and certainly creative...politics at play!

[greg draiss]

This is a great idea.....if we can have left and right wing hot sauces then anything to sell plants in a lighthearted manner

The TROLL

[Laura Bell]

So glad this was a prank. I do my best to ignore or avoid all of the political posturing and name-calling and was thus dreading the idea of staying out of my favorite IGC until November (assuming this would all just go away once the election is done)!

[Jason]

A new development on this front: As a result of the Supreme Court's Citizens United decision, an array of Super PACs associated with Karl Rove, the Koch brothers, the AFL-CIO, and others will be bombarding gardeners in swing states with free "Super PLANT PACKS." The Super PACKS contain plants that have been adopted as symbols by rival candidates in key races (much as the opposing sides did in England's Wars of the Roses). The idea is to replace yard signs with the plants associated with specific candidates, each candidate seeking to dominate their district's front yards with "their" plants. Savvy political consultants are advising clients to time their Super PACK shipments carefully to coincide with the earliest possible successful planting date, and also to pick plant symbols that are rampant spreaders, such as members of the mint family.

Some candidates are already slinging rhetorical compost at each other with accusations that their rivals are planning to use invasives like garlic mustard and purple loosestrife as their campaign plant.

Sorry, I couldn't help it. I'll stop now.